January 18th, 2011

I keep a journal of everytime I talk to you
-everytime I see your face-
and I cry

and I cry

I cry and I pray
to wake up and be you.
to open my eyes and be
beautiful.

You are my only wish.

Why can't you be true?
and the sad part is,
it can never be so.
not because I don't try.
not because I can't dream
and beg and plead- and want and NEED-
but...................... because it's FRAKING physically impossible and it wouldn't ever be right..... wouldn't EVER be BETTER....
I'll never be better.
will this sickness ever get better?
I don't think so.
because it's not a frakin' sickness.
it's not a disease or a disorder.
just a deformity.

my head doesn't quite match my body.
I never asked for this.

I look at him and I cry - sob - bawl- - -
envy. jealousy. wanting. longing. (crying)

(shh... it's a secret)

Danger Days

Joker (again)

"Killing is making a choice."

I love the way his face glows with the passion of the fight, giving into his anger. With each hit I take, his fists become more heated. maybe he'll man up and DO IT already!

"I want you to do it, I want you to do it. I want you to do it... come on... hit me. HIT ME!"
-THWAK-

My giddy giggles gush out with the blood. All the while I know my sick grimace only urges him on. I can't help but smile. For onlookers, bystanders, our mutual hatred of eacother may look manic, but there's a method to our madness...

"Bats *hehe*..."
-THUNK-
"Ahhhahaha..."
-WHACK-
"Oh... Bats, I want you to know something about me- something... personal."

He pauses his onslaught to listen, still furious- fists clenching. Fingers restless with unquenchable hatred.

*hehe*
"I want you to know, Bats baby...
that I don't HATE you becaue I'm CRAZY...
I'm CRAZY because I HATE you!"

As the rain of fists comes so does an anguised scream of hysteria.

"I LOVE YOU, BATS!"

January 13, 2011

The bodies were packed in tight. Not only because there were alot of us, but mostly because the room was so small- clostrophobic. No windows. One door. One way in and one way out, for some of the more talkative of us maybe not even that much. We could very well die in here. That's the problem with living this life- a life of thugs, sometimes we just can't shut our fat mouths.
Everyone here wants this gig, but I think I'm the most passionate... or maybe just the most desperarte. He's a Joker, boss is. Wouldn't hesitate to slaughter the lot of us. May even enjoy it... LAUGH about it. (hehe) A guy like me has to admire a guy like him- being the coward I am. Weel, not a coward, persay, more like a guy who likes to lay low... take the safe way out- not the easy way- just the safe one. I've been taking alot of flak from my crew lately about it. I've gotta show 'em that I got what it takes to survive in this town. Cuz Gotham's tough. Tougher than what most people see... because they don't live on the inside... they can't see beyond the surface.
The florescent light flickers, dimming. BANG. A shot through the door, buckshot sprays, catches a few of us but misses me. They go down hard. I like the way this guy plays. The door creaks open as the main attraction walks in, suave- an oddly innocent grin.

"Evening, Ladies."

His chelsea grin eerily inviting.
I like this guy.
Joker...

January 10, 2011

my mother was a carpenter
my father was a saint
I give you everything you want
but still you feel the same
my cousin was a big bad wolf
my baby sister
a red balloon.
who would know
what I think
cuz I'm just as confused as you.
I love the way you look at me
with those blue canary eyes
I love the way you talk to me
in your clarinet romantic voice
clearly I'm out of my mind
my green and pink and black-and-blue
mind...
red and black
and purple
and blue
and black blood
running
running
spilling over
over the edge...
clearly I'm a little off
a little out of touch
but without you you know that I wouldn't even
be that much.
out of touch
out of my mind
out of my head,
my wounds scream with joy
my hatred with a smile
a greedy grin and
a smirk
my hands lead me on
but my eyes are blind to the things that I've done- the places I've been- the people I've seen.
yes. seen. I have seen through her invisible tainted red lipsticked smile.
a greed grin and
a smirk...

My Favorite Joker

this is the best piece of digital art I've ever made. it's painted in photoshop ^_^ enjoy